RESORA
life gets better when you do
Issue No. 11
The Opener
Sometimes it shows up on a day when nothing is wrong.
Nobody is sick. Nothing bad happened. You are not in any kind of crisis. And still there is this feeling sitting in your chest that you cannot shake. Like something is slightly off but you cannot point to what. Like you are waiting for something but you do not know what you are waiting for.
So you go through the list. You check your phone. You think through your week. You try to find the thing that must be causing it. And when you cannot find it, a second feeling piles on top of the first one. Now you feel off and guilty about feeling off, because what do you even have to feel this way about.
You are not broken. And you are not alone in this.
A Real Moment
The hard part about this kind of feeling is that you cannot argue with it or fix it. You can fix a problem. You can talk through a fight. You can rest when you are tired. But when the feeling does not have a clear cause, there is nothing to solve and nowhere to direct it. It just sits there.
And you still have to show up. You still have to go through the day, answer people, be present, get things done. All while carrying something you cannot even name. That is exhausting in a way that does not show on the outside, which means most of the people around you have no idea it is happening.
That is a heavy thing to carry by yourself. And you have been carrying it longer than you should have to.
Something You Can Use
When the feeling does not have a reason, stop looking for one. Searching for the cause usually just gives the feeling more room to grow. You go looking for what is wrong and your brain starts finding candidates, and suddenly you are anxious about four things instead of none.
Instead, just name it. Not I am anxious because. Just I am anxious right now. Say it out loud if you can. That is it. You do not need a reason before you are allowed to acknowledge how you feel.
The goal today is not to fix it. The goal is just to get through the day without being hard on yourself for feeling it in the first place.
A Moment for You
Both feet flat on the floor. Feel the ground under you.
Breathe in for four counts. Hold for four. Out for six. Do that twice. You are here. You are safe right now. The feeling is real and it is not the same thing as something actually being wrong. Your body sometimes needs a reminder of that. This is the reminder.
Something to Sit With
What would you tell someone you love if they came to you feeling exactly this way?
You do not need a reason to be gentle with yourself. You just need to decide to do it.
We are not going to tell you this goes away or that there is a simple answer. But we will tell you this: the quiet dread, the feeling of being slightly off on a day when everything is fine, a lot of people are walking around with that same thing and saying nothing. You are not the only one. Not even close.
Life gets better when you do. And sometimes doing is just getting through today a little more gently than you got through yesterday.